911- A Tribute to Light- Respect & Remembrance

The Tribute in Light
I join with you in honoring the lives that were taken, the ones that were given in service, and the ones that life breathed the breathe of promise & hope into.
twin towers-the tributeI stand in awe today as I reflect on the 14th Anniversary of a historical day when our great Nation was attacked. I would like to invite you into an open space with me. A space that allows your heart and mind to be open to inspiration, reflection and a commitment. A commitment to reflect for a moment on the thousands of lives & heroes that spoke their very last words to their loved ones on September 11, 2001.
And a commitment to turn your eyes & attention forward 14 years. So many people and sites relive the footage, news stories, graphic details and the pain as if almost wanting America to re-live the pain and remove our permission to heal and move forward as the great Nation that we are. There are so many sites on the Internet, inundating our inboxes with vast amounts of “facts, stats, heart wrenching stories, and painstaking pictures” to yank us right back into the throes of the hell we experienced a decade ago.
We will never forget. Nor should we. But we can choose to forgive. To honor the past is a crucial piece in your personal development. But to cherish the present is one of the cornerstones of your joy & freedom. That is the only way for a true healing and the fabric of peace to weave through the hearts of all nations and blanket the world. Forgiveness. Forgiveness is among one of the bravest acts of honor, dignity, integrity and courage. One Nation under God. Be it that there is a difference between a nation and a country, I say God blesses and governs all of “us”.
“The buildings may have come down, but through the LIGHT we will ascend with honor, our great nation” ~Stacie Campanelli 
Faith, forgiveness & compassion is what brought the best out in a situation that appeared to be the end for so many lives left breathing. This is where I stand today and every day forward. I invite you to stand with me and honor the country that stands taller today then we did a decade ago. A country that will continue to grow in strength regardless of adverse circumstances, conditions, trials and temporary setbacks. We ALWAYS bounce back. We always stand taller than before. The Tribute of Light extends directly to Gods home office. Doesn’t get much taller than that 😉 God bless the USA. I am proud to be an American and send the love of myself and my family to the hearts and homes all around the globe.
 The love, the compassion, the tremendous commitment and good will that so many Americans (and our sister/brother countries) demonstrated, stood up and brought forward. We pulled together to rebuild our fallen communities and Nation as we were reflecting and remembering.
Enjoy a little inspiration this morning and maybe a different perspective on 9/11.
 “Love is the answer to the crucial political and moral questions of our time… to overcome oppression and violence without resorting to oppression and violence. Man must evolve a method which rejects revenge, aggression and retaliation. The foundation of such a method is love.”        ~MartinLuther King Jr. –Nobel Prize acceptance speech, 1964.
 As you set the intent for your day, may everyone that you hold dear to you know the value they have in your life and their own, may you express freely, & share the love you have with everyone, and may the light of forgiveness pave your path with peace & joy <3
 Thank God for the ‘little’ annoyances in life.

After Sept. 11th, one company invited the remaining members of other companies who had been decimated by the attack on the Twin Towers to share their available office space. At a morning meeting, the head of security told stories of why these people were alive…… 

He started the meeting by saying,

“As you might know, the head of the company got in late that day because his son started kindergarten.

Another fellow was alive because it was
his turn to bring donuts.

One woman was late because her
alarm clock didn’t go off in time.

One was late because of being stuck on the NJ Turnpike
because of an auto accident.

One of them missed his bus.

One spilled food on her clothes
and had to take some extra time to change.

One’s car wouldn’t start.
One went back home to get his cell phone.

One had a child that dawdled and didn’t get ready as soon as he should have.

One couldn’t get a taxi.

The one that struck me was the man who put on a new pair of shoes that morning, took the various means to get to work but before he got there, he developed a blister on his foot. He stopped at a drugstore to buy a Band-Aid. That is why he is alive today.

Now when I am stuck in traffic, miss an elevator, turn back to answer a ringing telephone, or forget my cell phone, 

all the little things that annoy me. I think to myself, this is exactly where
God wants me to be at this very moment.

Next time your morning seems to be going wrong, the children are slow getting dressed, you can’t seem to find the car keys, you hit every traffic light, don’t get mad or frustrated; You are right where you are suppose to be….

May you continue to be blessed with all those annoying little things and may you remember their possible purpose.
Be blessed enough to receive, and inspired enough to share
Grace & Gratitude,

911 a **Very Personal** Share

Serenity-Peace-Storm-Equanimity-Stacie-Campanelli  9-11-2015 is an anniversary for a very personal life changing experience for me as well.

As a spiritual healer, lightworker, transformational coach and trainer, I am not offered immunity to trials and tribulations. I would say, it’s quite the opposite. I find myself at times having to strengthen my own core truth and experiencing spiritual growing pains as I embrace my higher purpose.  It is in the dark times of our lives that the seed of spiritual inner growth is broken open and begins or continues to take root.  As the seed develops, it draws from the soil and sustenance of its environment.  During the growth period, as its roots are strengthening, it is continually striving to reach through the dirt and darkness and ascend towards the light.  The seed never breaks open in the sunshine. It breaks open deep in the dark, cold, dirt & soil. The sunshine is where it draws its first and continual breath of life.

18 months ago, today, I experienced what I thought marked the end of an almost two year dark period in my life. Arising from a series of events that finally broke me down and took its toll on me on every level. The experience, so traumatic, affected me not only mentally, emotionally, spiritually, but took a huge bite out of me physically as well. It literally shook and rocked me to my feminine core. This experience broke me open to the point that it made me really question the last 40+ yrs of my life, my past, my message, my mission, my purpose, my why. Through the support of my own coach and counseling, I began reflecting on the root cause (my core belief system) which resulted in my choices, my own deep patterns, and my paradigm. Just when I thought (seriously, I did) things couldn’t get any worse, low and behold, I began reliving past traumatic events (that I thought I was “over”, and healed of).

Clearly, I wasn’t.

I started going deeper into my own dark night of the soul. As I was going through my own past pains and Queening up my messes, I was also in the throes of developing my new core training, coaching and empowerment programs. A lot of changes were happening through me. All of which I know were Divinely guided and inspired.

As a Spiritual Healer & Lightworker, I have experienced the Dark Night of the Soul many times, but this time, was different. I knew exactly what I was experiencing and more importantly, why.  I began searching for answers in every dark, beaten, scarred corner of my mind, my heart, my soul. I was begging & pleading for my truth, my core truth. Not my beliefs or my family’s and friends beliefs or even my mentors, colleagues and peers. It was time for me to discover MY CORE TRUTH. MY why.  I had learned a few years back that Shania Twain went through a similar experience.  She went through a chain of events that took her all the way down. To her very core of existence.  She was to discover exactly who she was and to breathe life into her greater self.  I knew I wasn’t alone in my quest.

My successes seemed to have taken a back seat to what my current ‘reality’ appeared to be.  Through both counseling and coaching I started unraveling the deep knotty layers of past trauma, wading through the shark infested waters of a lifetime of past abuse, violence and hardships. I really began to doubt myself, my abilities, my gifts, my uniqueness- and my confidence, self worth, and esteem took an enormous hit. There were days when I felt as if I had completely lost any sense of who I was as a mentor, coach, trainer, mother, friend and woman.

Forward to today…Because of my experiences- the good, the bad, the ugly and the truth,it’s allowed me to delve deeper into my cause for authentic women’s empowerment and spiritual awakening- To stand taller, to Rise to my Size and achieve clarity as clear as a Waterford crystal vase.

As I am preparing to launch my new podcast series on iTunes, “Queens Quest: Who Do You Think You Are?!”, Personal, Professional and Spiritual Transformation for The Awakening Woman in the next few weeks, I am also launching my new transformational coaching and empowerment programs.  They truly are “The Queen of all empowerment, transformational, coaching and training programs.”  I know this to be true. I am also in the works of creating my nonprofit organization that supports women (especially, single mothers) and children to dramatically improve the quality of their lives.  The system I have developed has been created out of the wisdom of my own pain, my past, and out of destruction and chaotic messes that I was able to truthfully, honestly, awaken from the internal broken lies, and, Queen up.

What we as a nation experienced through September 11, 2001 was absolutely horrific. There are not enough words to give justice to the death and destruction that rocked our country.

In the wise words of Deepak Chopra, “All great changes are preceded by chaos.”  There are always greater things that develop and grow from destruction.  A Phoenix rises from every ash – I know this to be true. There is greater support, stronger communities, new organizations are created to help, more people get involved and causes are lit on fire.  And always always, we are called to rise higher.

In closing, I will say, that sometimes as we are desperately trying to put the past behind us, bury it, busy ourselves with outward appearances of wealth, success, surface happiness, forget what has happened, it’s not always a simple task.  The body remembers.  When we try to forge ahead, think positive happy happy happy thoughts, what we are actually doing is digging ourselves deeper in debt. Emotional debt, mental, physical, financial and most importantly, spiritual debt.  If we are not lit on fire every morning with the joys of our hearts, if we are not living the truth of life for ourselves, then we are living a lie. We are stuck in the past. Living and lying in someone else’s story. We are stuck in reverse and cannot truly, honestly move forward because what we want so much to put behind us is exactly the ugly lies we need to face head on and embrace the truth- The dark fears you’ve so neatly stuffed down and hidden away, will continue to rise up in your relationships and life’s experiences- until you get real, reveal the lies, then face and embrace the truth.

Ask yourself this one question, pause and allow yourself permission to answer with the truth:

Am I living my truth, every day, with everyone, in every situation?

If you are not experiencing all four core values in your daily life (Love, Peace, Joy, Freedom) then it’s time for a wake up call. It may be the very thing that you need to light up so you can ignite the flames that will burn off the dirt, burn off the lies and rebirth you into your greater, better, bigger self. It is time that you play a bigger game-  Maybe that’s the only way you can put the past behind you by lighting your pain on fire- to grow you and rise you even higher.

Awakening. Truth. Mine. I will continue to seek it, I will continue to speak it. I will be the light, the lifeboat and the ladder to help women rise to their royal size.

With great honor and so much love for you,


Motherhood Doesn’t Have To Mean Growing Up.

***Motherhood Presto Chango***

How can you tell if you have either super chilled out or super spiritually matured and are embracing a more adventurous life?

Hmmm…Well, for 27 years since I first became a mother, I have always been really good about allowing all 5 of my children to indulge their fancies/uniqueness regarding trends, music, excursions, sports, clothes/hair/piercings/food choices within reason, etc…INCLUDING pets like dogs, cats, rabbits, rats, hamsters, fish, spiders, snakes and other creepy crawlie creatures that made my skin crawl because MOM was always the one who ended up feeding and taking care of them.

And I HATE creepy crawlers-ESPECIALLY snakes. Blecchh!

But, because I didn’t want to project my fears onto my children, I allowed them to indulge. I had one (really, just one) non-negotiable, non compromising ain’t gonna happen no way, no how, h*ll no, stop asking because I said so rule.

No full size trampolines.


H*ll no.

No way. Because I said so. Period.

I even tried to appease them a bit by getting the mini trampoline with the bars so they could jump. I love jumping on my mini.

They don’t.

I have adventurously fearless children, especially my two boys.
My oldest son has had 4 concussions. One of which was on a trampoline.

They tried to argue and plead their case for many years with the safety, promises, being considerate when younger siblings and friends jumped, the sales pitch of “but mom we can put the safety net around it”, etc.

I. Said. No.

So here we are 27 years later, my oldest son finally won his argument and is on his way as I type this with his 12 year old little sister to go pick up his ‘surprise’ present for the family…

Yep. A full size trampoline. Lexie is over the top excited and I am doing my best to pretend that I am not going to jump on it.

Every. Single. Day.

Growing in grace & maturity doesn’t have to mean growing up or growing old. It can very well mean;

What the hell, why not, sure it sounds like a lot of fun, and it’s really great cardio exercise. And I have always been a fun kind of mom, so? 😉

How I Confronted, Challenged and Conquered a Giant Fear. And The Fun & Freedom I Enjoyed After!

Personal Sunday Sermon:

Super Bright Good Morning and Happy Sun-Day! ☺☀💗

I had absolutely one of the best most “funnest” times yesterday at my Daughters’Stacie-Campanelli-Roller-Skatingskating birthday party. I was reacquainted and reunited with one of my greatest memories and passions from many years ago- A rekindling of one of the best love interests of my life: Roller skating.

As a kid I did all I could do to remain centered and calm until school let out Friday for the weekend. Given all the drama and dysfunction at home, the weekends were my escape into my play world of friends, music and roller skating. I was really good at it too. I even got really good at break-dancing…(that’s another story for another day). My girlfriends and I use to compete and win those crazy fun skating rink competitions and little did we know we were getting the best exercise, like, ever.

The endorphin’s created over the weekends seemed to help me deal better with the wars going on during the week inside my family home.

I’m not sure exactly why I gave it up- guessing all the familial ick and time passing, but I never lost my love of skating.

As the years went on I would often wonder and secretly wish I could confront my fear and summon the courage to tie those four wheels on my feet and skate with grace while maintaining my balance as I made my way with laughter and play around the rink.

Well yesterday, with the beaming support of my kids (and a 20+ year friendship/sisterhood) I not only confronted that fear but conquered “getting back in the saddle”, never fell one time and only sat down for a quick second twice in almost 3 hours on the rink. None of the super daring crazy stunts, but this grown woman felt the goodness and giddiness of the little girl again and it felt…so…good.

I am not going to kidya…

Today, well, I’m recovering a wee tad and yet with a huge smile I say this, I’m miserably happy ☺. The fun, freedom and fabulous way to an enjoyable life and fitness is when we confront, challenge and conquer our fears.

When we have the support of friends and family-whether blood or the ones we choose- our tribe of support, we truly can conquer and own any mountain or dream we want.

We also must have the unshakable confidence and belief in ourselves.

Now maybe next up- for starters I can confront, challenge myself and conquer ice skating and roller blading, and snow boarding…umm, well, maybe 😉

Skate on 💗

Happy Father’s Day!

Happy-Fathers-Day-Dad-Mom-Stacie-Campanelli-Billy-Graham-Quote-2015Neither my children (especially my daughters) nor I were personally blessed with the unconditional love, support, butterfly kisses and toe on toe dancing experiences of a “Daddy”.

However…that has never stopped me from revering, loving and honoring the many wonderful daddies we have been blessed to know. They have always given me hope and inspiration. There are so many fathers that raise the bar, set the standards and lead by exemplary example.

Thank you to all of you.

The single dads, married, gay, straight, etc. You are the masculine rock of true love & support for our little people. There is something soulfully sexy about a man who honors his father role and cherishes the lives of the little hearts entrusted to him.

Soulfully and spiritually sexy.

For all the wonderful Fathers whose undying love, solid commitment, honor, integrity and adoration to raise and support their babes, and to love, support and respect their Mothers, I say thank you. You have and continue to provide such hope and inspiration to those of us who were not afforded that luxury and privilege. I am honored to be among so many men who lead the way and offer hope and inspiration to me, my children and so many others <3 God Bless you Daddies for raising not only the best children and supporting an authentic family structure, but raising the bar and setting the standard for the rest.

The Gifts I Discovered in Grieving the Recent Death of My Dad

Serenity-Peace-Storm-Equanimity-Stacie-CampanelliNot a PG post: Ya know- There is an interesting pattern I am noticing ever since my dad died less than a week ago. I have spent this past week in deep soul meditation, pools of tears, familial reflection and prayer. My dad has come to me a few times via his scent and leaving me several other ‘signs’ that sent my heart spinning and the tears to flood my eyes. He chose to donate his body to science (which I feel is a very noble thing to do), and there won’t be a true memorial service for him until his remains are returned home.

I feel like even though he donated his body to science, there are a few treasures I inherited from him. My dad had a love and gift of the metaphysical world. All things included. We shared many of these traits and ever since his passing, my ‘gifts’ have become increasingly stronger. He also transferred his (embracing my Italian heritage-“testicoli” or “palle”) to me.

I have always been an empath and an HSP and although not always comfortable with these gifts, I have always been acutely aware and in touch with that side of me- I have been criticized, chastised and condemned for these gifts since I was a very little girl. It took me many a decades to finally embrace my individuality and uniqueness and honor the gifts I was blessedly born with. This experience has taken that to a whole other level.

I feel as if I have been spiritually shakened awake and no longer allowed to remain in a slightly spiritual slumber. I have learned over the years as I have emotionally and spiritually matured that with the gift of empaths/HSP’s attracts a lot of different personalities, incl. narcissists, sociopaths, energy vampire people, and soul depleting experiences- both family and friends. I have also embraced the gifts within responsibility/accountability and learned so much over the years to stand up for myself, owning my voice, my truth, my core values and speaking truth into the love and the life I deserve to experience. And allowing the love, honor and support I give to love, honor and support me back.

Not always a comfortable or easy task.

In this past week, there have been numerous emotional ghosts of the past that have reappeared via people/patterns/experiences and I have boldly and unapologetically addressed each one. Some directly and some just cutting the choking cords that bind.

Letting go of the gunk and the junk is almost an unexpainable liberty. But since my dad has passed, I feel the strength rising ever stronger in me in giving myself permission to feel, to face, to address, to let go of toxic patterns, people, and past painful experiences that no longer serve me or those I love. Reasons, seasons lifetimes.

So true.

Once we spiritually evolve and emotionally grow, we can truly, peacefully without apology learn to let go.

And to reiterate…doing this without apology.

That is crazy to me. But a crazy that is liberating and life breathing. Trust and know that those who belong in your true tribe, will come, stay, protect, preserve and support. Those that don’t, will fall away gracefully when you learn to let go of the need and the struggle to be ‘liked, loved, accepted’ and learn to like, love and accept yourself. Faults, flaws and all that makes you imperfectly, perfect.

Thanks Dad for the gifts.

I love you <3

The Truth About Spiritual Evolution and Authentic Empowerment

Spiritual evolution and authentic empowerment requires the total transformation through these 4 critical phases:

Breakdowns, Barriers, Boundaries and Breakthroughs. Facing, revealing, feeling, re-defining, protecting, honoring and healing- stripping away of the almost infinite layers of the ego and constant breakthroughs.

That is the only way to have liberation and freedom to live a life you love and love the life you live. Not the lies you’ve been sold and the BS you’ve been told.

I don’t care what anyone else tells you. Many days it sucks. Plain English. I know. Especially when you’re an Nth degree empath and feel every single emotion to your core. I’ve done it for over four decades now. Fighting it, falling flat, letting go so I can rise higher, falling further and rising even higher. Breakthroughs and freedom happen once the ego has given way to spiritual growth, understanding and maturity. That’s the surrender.

If it was easy, everyone would choose the Spiritual path.

It’s. Not. Easy.

Enlightening, Elevating and Empowering, yes.

But Not. Easy.

When the path you’ve chosen in life is singular focused than perhaps not so tough. I don’t know. However, and considering the dynamics and severity and consistency of dysfunction in your upbringing, it is not a rosy posy fluff and stuff mush in the middle pretty or always playful road to travel. Then when you add each additional child into the mix and season it with numerous abusive and toxic relationships and friendships, it certainly intensifies the pain in the process, and shapes you into an entire new human being. If you allow it.

A beautiful, brave, up-leveled, evolved and authentically empowered new, true, you.

Letting go can be so difficult and immensely painful and yet we know when we let go, it allows everyone the freedom to grow through their own journeys. Our children come through us, not for us. And so many people cross our paths to teach us exactly how to love and let go.

Not easy. I know. This is something over the years that I have had to remind myself of often.

It can be done. With patience, persistence, faith and grace, life transforms us and shows us our true self which is perfectly imperfect, deeply loved and infinitely accepted.

Happy Mother’s Day!

Happy Mothers Day 2015- Stacie Campanelli
Moms all across the world. No one will ever understand like we do in the way the pendulum swings between the pains and pleasures of Motherhood. No one will ever see just how much love we hold inside our hearts for our children.

Regardless of circumstances and behaviors.

Trusting with faith and hope, that they will always find their way home. The tireless, endless, undying love and loyalty we have is Second. To. None.

The commonality we all share in Motherhood, yet each one of us unique and beautiful and brave in our own personal experiences.
One thing remains true for all; We love. We stand. We rise, day after day. Again and again.

Single mothers, you have my immense respect. We travel the same path. All mothers; I honor and adore all of us today. The most bittersweet journey of my life. But one I wouldn’t trade for anything Happy Mothers Day.

And in This Corner! We Have a Pissed Off Woman.

[Photo credit: Habitat for Humanity]
Mayweather-Pacquiao-Habitat-for-Humanity-Stacie-Campanelli Ok so, I rarely speak out on violence/negative/destructive news and happenings. I really do my best to keep all my pages light, loving, hopeful, inspirational and empowering. There are so many other pages, blogs and channels that freely and generously share and speak out on the nasty, negative ick and constantly remind us of what a cruel, heartless, evil world we live in. I try to go the other way and show the flip side of the shadows and shine a light brighter than the ick.

This however, has me dancing with my dark side and in the name of my integrity and what fuels my passion, I am speaking out.

I have been biting my tongue and biting my tongue and doing everything in my “take the high road” power to avoid speaking out on this fight being held here today at the MGM for Floyd Mayweather vs. Manny Pacquiao. For one thing: I have always always hated (yep I know it’s a strong word, but I stand by it) fighting of any sort, especially boxing. It physically hurts me and enrages me to see people hurting people. I don’t get the ‘sport’ nor do I have any desire to get it. I hate it. That’s just my core nature as a “sensitive, HSP, Nth degree empath”.

However, the ironic thing is I do not mind seeing a bully get brought to their knees especially when they think they are untouchable. I value justice over mercy. Male or female justice- I am not gender biased. Bullying is bullying.

For those of you who take offense-

I am not going to apologize. I am going to share my thoughts and opinion. I am giving a heads up so you can choose to mute or unfriend me if you so choose. I understand. I wish you well.

No matter where I’ve gone today it is the talk of the town. Yesterday it was the hot topic in school as my professor was pointing out the way “Las Vegas” works around “money and generating revenue”. I was told that this fight will bring in a vast amount of prostitutes and citywide security and police have taken extreme safety measures given what kind of “charge” this type of event brings to our town. I feel ashamed and embarrassed to even say I live in Las Vegas right now. In the famous words of Meredith Vieira, “I am not a victim, I am just pissed off.” Bravo.

I am all for generating revenue for our city, but not at the expense of making Las Vegas the biggest prostitute of all and selling out on morals and integrity for our women and children.

I have been a “Nevadan” for about 4 decades and I recently started a nonprofit here in Las Vegas because I wanted to help lift and empower women & their children who have been beaten spiritually, mentally, emotionally AND physically (including financially).

I do this because I have been there in my own life, so many times.

So. Many. Times.

To know that the Nevada Athletics Committee granted Mayweather a license to promote his fights here considering his well known and documented history with beating women, absolutely disgusts me. Knowing full well (according to The Violence Policy Center) for almost a decade Nevada has ranked among the top 10 states for the rate of women killed by men. In 2012 we ranked number 6. The final straw for me was the email I just got yesterday from Habitat for Humanity praising “incredible sold out ticket sales” and thanking everyone for their support on this and their generosity. I don’t get it. Truly.

We are building homes for families who are in crisis, some I am sure due to violence of some sort, and doing it through “blood and beating” money??


I was unable to attend the protest yesterday at the MGM with Southern Nevada NOW,​ but I am as equally outraged as the masses. Disgusted, enraged, and truly beyond pissed off. This guy…this Mayweather who thinks himself as a glorious and chosen golden-child untouchable and above any law. Who has financially teased, taunted and trained court officials, (being granted a sentence postponement to serve his 3 month jail term, until he was able to finish his fight, in Las Vegas). Along with state officials, the media, the blind fans, his equally deplorable “friends” and anyone who thinks what he has done over the past 14 years in regards to domestic violence INCLUDING pleading guilty to beating the mom of 3 of his kids IN FRONT of them while his FRIEND blocked the kids from getting out of the house to go get help so his friend could finish beating his ex girlfriend (Josie Harris).AND pleading no contest to threatening the children if they spoke or intervened-

This behavior is to be OK and dismiss-able in the name of “money”?

Let’s look on the flip side to this. I hear that Pacquiao (according to this article from USA Today- http://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/boxing/2015/04/07/floyd-mayweather-manny-pacquiao-las-vegas-welterweight-bout/25432311/) is being fueled to beat Mayweather because of his domestic violence history. His manager is calling this fight, “good against evil.”

Manny Pacquiao grew up in a domestic violence home watching his father beat his mother.

Well, if that is the case, I will step off my platform, bow down and send Pacquiao every ounce of energy, support and goodwill and God speed that I can. To take the bully down. And hopefully out. I wish you the strength of all the gods Manny.

My rant is over. For now. Thank you for listening <3 www.StacieCampanelli.com #FloydMayweather #MannyPacquiao #MayweatherPaquiao #MGMMay1 #MayPac #boxing #BoycottMayweather #Bullying #DomesticViolence #AntiBullying #MayweatherPacquiaoFight #PacMan

Victim Blaming is a Blindsighted Way to Mask the Truth

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      Victim_Blaming_Queen_Whisperer_Stephen_Collins_Bill_Cosby_National_Sexual_Violence_Resource_Center                                                                                                                              The story clip highlighted below from the National Sexual Violence Resource Center surrounding actor Stephen Collins affected my family and especially one of my daughters and I greatly. So devastating. All my children grew up watching 7th Heaven and we were all inspired by the ‘wholesomeness’ of the show. I know we are not alone in our disappointment and disgust with this story as well as the recent events surrounding Bill Cosby. We loved The Cosby Show. Both situations are disheartening and painstaking. For everyone involved, directly and indirectly. Victims, perpetrators and (alleged) perpetrators. This affects us all collectively, as a Nation.
Two American iconic father figures have fallen. It seems the higher the pedestal we place our heroes on, the harder the fall. For a lot of people. It’s very challenging not to jump on the propaganda bandwagon when victim after victim step up and step out to share their truth. We do have to give respect to due process and allow evidence to be presented and followed. That being said, I will also say, to place sole blame on the ‘victim’ is certainly no way to unmask the truth and bring about justice and fairness and healing to anyone.
Victim blaming is really a blindsided way to mask the truth. This topic is something I can speak into from very personal experience. Victim blaming is one of the worst things society, media and communities can can do to hide the truth, hinder healing and highlight the shame and humiliation already hiding and deeply hurting inside the victims. Sexual harassment, rape, sexual discrimination, and abuse is never ok.
It is never ok.
It is never the fault of the victim.
Tolerating the behavior does NOT translate into consensual acceptance. Being in and working in an environment that has cultivated this culture as an accepted way and viewed as a ‘normal’ way of living and working does NOT make it acceptable or consensual.
My personal stories will be coming to light in 2015. Shedding the shame, and opening the door to healing both ourselves and others can only happen when we open our hearts and our mouths- to speak out and share our stories.
Speak and shine a light on this horrible horrible topic. 2015- It’s time to heal. You deserve to heal. You have held it in long enough. If you or someone you know has has experienced any of this deplorable behavior, please share and please keep this in mind:
You obviously didn’t deserve their respect and their honor and they most definitely do not deserve your silence and protection.


Actor Stephen Collins will be interviewed on ABC 20/20 tonight. When an accused/prosecuted offender tells his or her story to the media, it can be jarring for survivors. A message to survivors from one of our experts:

– You are not alone.
– If you choose to listen to an offender tell their story, remember that at any time you can stop listening. Please be kind to yourself.
– While listening, it is normal for you to remember your own experiences. These memories do not negate your strength and resiliency. You are an exceptional human being for the creativity, resourcefulness and strength that has kept you here.
– We believe you.
– If you would like to talk, there are resources available to you. Call RAINN‘s National Sexual Assault Hotline at 1-800-656-HOPE. Access NSVRC’s directory of state, territory and tribal anti-sexual assault coalitions and national allied organizations here: http://www.nsvrc.org/organization. You can contact us directly: resources@nsvrc.org, 877-739-3895.