Not a PG post: Ya know- There is an interesting pattern I am noticing ever since my dad died less than a week ago. I have spent this past week in deep soul meditation, pools of tears, familial reflection and prayer. My dad has come to me a few times via his scent and leaving me several other ‘signs’ that sent my heart spinning and the tears to flood my eyes. He chose to donate his body to science (which I feel is a very noble thing to do), and there won’t be a true memorial service for him until his remains are returned home.
I feel like even though he donated his body to science, there are a few treasures I inherited from him. My dad had a love and gift of the metaphysical world. All things included. We shared many of these traits and ever since his passing, my ‘gifts’ have become increasingly stronger. He also transferred his (embracing my Italian heritage-“testicoli” or “palle”) to me.
I have always been an empath and an HSP and although not always comfortable with these gifts, I have always been acutely aware and in touch with that side of me- I have been criticized, chastised and condemned for these gifts since I was a very little girl. It took me many a decades to finally embrace my individuality and uniqueness and honor the gifts I was blessedly born with. This experience has taken that to a whole other level.
I feel as if I have been spiritually shakened awake and no longer allowed to remain in a slightly spiritual slumber. I have learned over the years as I have emotionally and spiritually matured that with the gift of empaths/HSP’s attracts a lot of different personalities, incl. narcissists, sociopaths, energy vampire people, and soul depleting experiences- both family and friends. I have also embraced the gifts within responsibility/accountability and learned so much over the years to stand up for myself, owning my voice, my truth, my core values and speaking truth into the love and the life I deserve to experience. And allowing the love, honor and support I give to love, honor and support me back.
Not always a comfortable or easy task.
In this past week, there have been numerous emotional ghosts of the past that have reappeared via people/patterns/experiences and I have boldly and unapologetically addressed each one. Some directly and some just cutting the choking cords that bind.
Letting go of the gunk and the junk is almost an unexpainable liberty. But since my dad has passed, I feel the strength rising ever stronger in me in giving myself permission to feel, to face, to address, to let go of toxic patterns, people, and past painful experiences that no longer serve me or those I love. Reasons, seasons lifetimes.
Once we spiritually evolve and emotionally grow, we can truly, peacefully without apology learn to let go.
And to reiterate…doing this without apology.
That is crazy to me. But a crazy that is liberating and life breathing. Trust and know that those who belong in your true tribe, will come, stay, protect, preserve and support. Those that don’t, will fall away gracefully when you learn to let go of the need and the struggle to be ‘liked, loved, accepted’ and learn to like, love and accept yourself. Faults, flaws and all that makes you imperfectly, perfect.
Thanks Dad for the gifts.
I love you <3